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Lady searching flirt Rainy day assistance. attractive male in Springfield seeking fun. you could say, "thank you. This is our first time here and we're only going to socialize and watch today." or "no, thanks." Short and sweet. If they argue, that is a. or I've said "thank you. I have to get to know people more before I play." If I like them okay, but not up for getting more involved yet. If they stay and chit chat for a couple minutes, that gets them brownie points. If they excuse themselves to go right after more fresh meat, that gives them negs. I also say, "no, thank you." Either with a smile if they seem nice but clueless. Or without one if they are being a pest. I also change the volume of how I say this. Organized groups usually have rules posted at orientation, at the party, and on their website. They also have Monitors wandering around or at the check in desk if you need firmer reinforcement of boundaries. Basic rules off the top of my head from local parties: don't touch what doesn't belong to you, whether impliments or a person. don't jump in to other people's scenes. Observe respectfully and not as a lookylou. People are not your personal porn show. Socialize and chat in the social areas. Other areas, talk quietly so not to interfere in other folks scenes or impinge on their head space. Clean up your play area when you are done. Take turns don't take the cool station the whole night/share. Use gloves and other barriers as stated in the rules. It reduces transmitting ick, helps the hosts with clean up/so other people can play there after. Depending on the region, if a collared person is at attention beside a non-collared person, sometimes one needs to talk to the dom instead of directly to the sub. They might be sceneing, or doing something d/s at the time, or the sub wants the dom to intercept folks. In other regions, in the social areas people talk to each other directly.