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Something good...
Happy New Year! Maybe you're the one. I'm a silly, laid back, somewhat -active, intelligently ridiculous, sarcastic witty, nicely behaved, pleasant looking man who is fairly new to the Pittsburgh area. I'm looking for a girl. What I'm doing with my life? Oh, god... Is this question is a buzz or what? Ha! What AMMM I doing with my life aside from rocking the dwindle. No, its not that bad. I'm basiy getting it going. I mean, not quite 'got it going', but close. I moved to Pennsylvania last year 'cause I've got some family here. I run a restaurant... Its okay and I like it but sometimes its hard 'cause I used to be an owner and now I'm running somebody else's. I recently staged a cou de' etat at work; so that's kinda funny. Sucker never saw it coming either! I've got an awesome dog named Cooper. I totally got off on the wrong foot with him and spoiled him bad about walking so now I gotta walk him like at least 45 minutes two or times a day. We like to walk. I like sitting around shooting the sh*tdrinking beer, wine, or whiskey either at a local dive or at home. So, what am I looking for? Hmmm, its not that easy. I mean, since I've got nothing, I'm open to a few different ideas. I want things or a thing. I'd love love... Maybe a *gasp* relationship. Yet, I'd love a real honest to friend. But only a friend who really wants an actual friend and knows how to be one, and be part of my life. I might have even posted this on *strictly platonic* but who am I kidding. I mean, you've got boobs. I like boobs. Sooner or later we'd both want me to touch 'em. I'm open to dates although I'm kind of poor so I don't have a ton of money for dating and I get bored quickly with non-meaningful relationships so... Shit, I don't know. I want those things most but if they're not happening I guess I'd like someone who wants to hang out and have sex sometimes too, to be perfectly honest. I mean, I don't just bang anyone but I'm totally not having enough sex. Ha! Who is, right? I guess if I could have my cake and eat it too (even though I hate cake) I'd love to find love, a best friend, and sex all wrapped into one and it a day. Happy as a clam! So basiy, I'm looking for a woman who is smart, silly, fun, sexy in her own way, and available; for the purpose of some sort of awesome relationship that would be based on friendship, companionship, fun, respect, monogamous sex, and hopefully love in some form. Got it? I know... I'm a dreamer, right? I love Scrabble and board ? Like playing pool. I like drinks ~ beer, whiskey, wine... And Dr. Pepper. I like to change my shoes or times per day? I like playing pool and darts, do so often. I'm an outdoors-man who likes to hike, climb, fish, and camp; do so regularly. I love those sticky hand things that ya' can get in gumball machines. Oh, and I have a big cabinet in my house that's chock full of all these little weird toys and oddities; it is beyond how I can describe it in this space. You'll see it and laugh. Maybe leave immediately having realized you're about to bang a 12 year old boy. I like fun and know how its done. I make fun of anything but mean no . I loath people who are negative, complainers, miserable, and drama-mongers. They should have some sort of * of Despair* and just bulldoze 'em all in to it. I was gonna say, and then bury 'em alive, but that wouldn't be nice. So basiy, the only game I don't like is Whac-A-Mole. You know, like that old time-y carnival game ed Whac-A-Mole where 'ya got these moles popping up out of holes and ya' gotta whack 'em down with that big, padded mallet? Is it a mallet? Anyway, Whac-A-Mole is kinda the same thing but there's no mole and there's no mallet. That makes no sense, I know. See, the is the MOLE and the NEGATIVITY or is the BIG MALLET. Example: Me - "Hello darlin', happy to see you. You look tonight, we're gonna have so much fun!". Offending Mallet - "I'm soooo tired, and they're for so I'll soon look like a drowned rat. I think I feel a headache coming on." WHACK! And BOOO! You should message me if you're fun and you want to have more fun. You like a good deal of what I wrote on this page. You're a person who is naturally good to other people. You want to have drinks with me from time to time. You actually know how to have whatever sort of relationship it is that you desire. You want to have pizza with me. You know that's a joke and you can handle that sort of humor. Maybe you'll sing and dance for a minute now and then in my kitchen with me and Cooper (we/he love that). You enjoy life and others who do so as well. If you dislike how I wrote so much, um... f %ks! P.S. I like people who are any or all of the following: A little bit crazy, free spirited, creative, , eccentric, weird, fringe, out there, spacey, extroverted, silly, funny, witty, and regularly recognize that it is, indeed, o'clock somewhere because we need to have drinks. DEALBREAKERS Poor hygiene Narcissistic types Dicks Evangelicals to waitstaff for little reason. I will get up and leave. Inconsiderate behavior Overly materialistic types Talk over-you-er's Teetotalers and the like Whac-A-Molers So, say hello. Don't feel like you've gotta match my verbiage, obviously... Who's got the time? But write at least a sentence or two of something informative and interesting. Right? None of this, 'Hi, how are you?' B.S. I'm good, okay? Got that out of the way. No "what's up?" either. Hello! The fucking sky! Booooring! Delete!
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looking for discrete fun m4w
white male, athletic build, and respectful looking to find one girl to enjoy discrete fun- must be over 35 without the games or drama. i will share pic once contact is made and verify that i will not be sent to a website. please put "fun in the sun" as your response to help me sort through the spam. 
